Sunday, March 23, 2014

We got those first world problems.

Let's talk about granite.

I have venetian gold granite in my kitchen. It's kind of a gold/black/honey colored granite with little sparkles and a tiny bit of gray. I fucking hate it. Now, please understand: I should be so lucky as to have this problem. On a list of problems that one could have, you could say that this could be classified as "not a problem", or perhaps "shut your overprivileged yuppy mouth, asshole". I am 100% in recognition of this. This does not change the fact that it drives me bonkers.

It's a lot darker and less gray than it looks in this crappy iPhone picture.

To say that "I fucking hate it" is also a relative term. Okay, it's an extremely overdramatic, hyperbolic thing to say, but you know. This is me you're talking to. I realize that we very easily could have moved into a house with, like, laminate countertop from 1978 (and not in a trendy way). Or one of those awful tile countertops that everything gets stuck in and you have to clean it with a toothbrush three times a day. Or linoleum, or something. (Did they even make linoleum countertops? I think I might be making that up.) And being that this is our first house and we probably won't live here longer than 10 years tops, it's unlikely that I would have installed new countertops regardless of what was here to begin with, so I would have had to live with it. But, in the granite world, it's pretty much the last color of granite or other types of solid material countertops I would ever choose. In fact, I probably wouldn't choose granite in general, but I'm getting to a really annoying, nitpick-y place here, so I digress. It's actually very pretty, but it's polar opposite from my style. It's very warm and contemporary, and I yearn for crisp, clean, modern and stark white. Especially in the kitchen. Also, it doesn't show ANYTHING. You'd think that would be a good thing, but when you're trying to keep your kitchen clean, it helps to be able to see what you're cleaning. I always feel like there's a big sticky puddle lurking in an undisclosed spot on my counter, just waiting for me to plop my hand in it. The newly discovered neat freak in me is NOT down with that.

I'm not the type to compromise, so at first I was bound and determined to install crisp white subway tile, and say to hell with the countertops. I'm certainly not going to replace perfectly good granite in a house that I don't plan on staying in forever, that would be absurd. I could deal with the white subway tile with these countertops; I think that it would neutralize them and it would look fine. But there's also the issue of our cabinets. They're off-white. If we install bright white subway tile, it will more than likely make the cabinets look dirty. I've considered re-painting them, but if we're being realistic there are a ton of things that could be done in this house that I'd rather do than re-paint our perfectly fine cabinets. Maybe once we get some more house projects under our belts I'll feel more motivated on the subject, but as of right now it seems kind of silly. So, I think I've conceded. I think that we can get away with a softer white, warmer subway tile while leaving the cabinets and the granite the way that they are. The kitchen will still be much brighter looking, but it will be more cohesive. Now I just have to decide if I can still get away with my light-gray-one-slate-blue-accent wall plan. I don't see why gray wouldn't work with the granite color, since there are flecks of gray right in it, but I can't really picture the room with gray walls. I definitely still want to work with my own style, while not having to do major renovations. Fingers crossed, guys. Fingers crossed.

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