Sunday, June 10, 2012

Please Stop Dancing on the Tables.

Friends, the St. Anthony's Italian Festival has arrived!

This will be my third year attending the Festival, and am I ever jazzed. The festival consists of blocks and blocks of live music, delicious Italian food, games (I guess), and so, so much alcohol.

You probably don't understand the level to which my friends and I tend to celebrate...our Italian heritage (no). Let me help to paint a mental picture for you.

The first year that I attended the Fest, my friends and I ended up line dancing with elderly people (or something), while my boyfriend looked on in horror and one of my friends passed out on a park bench.

That PALES in comparison to the mayhem that was last year.

Last year, my friends and I pre-gamed with four bottles of wine between five people, finishing them off during an enthusiastic power hour. Jeff (my boyfriend) decided at this point that he was too loose to attend the Fest, and retired home. Unfortunately, the rest of us soldiered on.

Upon arriving at the Fest, each of us purchased a PITCHER (which contained an entire bottle) of wine, and sat down to enjoy some music while we drank. This led to us trying to rouse the crowd with a bit of table dancing. Unfortunately, before the crowd could fully enjoy the cheer that we were trying to spread, we were politely asked to remove ourselves from the tables. That was okay, though. It was time to find some broccoli rabe!

I'm not going to lie to you and tell you I remember how that turned out. I DO remember my friend Troy and I getting lost en route to the porta potties, and being escorted by some very helpful police officers. (Thanks, guys!) All I know is that soon after, I decided that I was also WAY too loose to be out in public, and called Jeff to come pick me up. I was upset that I didn't stay long enough to eat a panzarotti (I have never in my life eaten a panzarotti, but for some reason I just got this NEED for it in my head), so I demanded he drive me to DP Dough in Newark, where I proceeded to weep openly in public because just why not?

Don't worry about my friends though, they ended up managing to STEAL several of the wine pitchers without recourse. Classy group, we are.

I'm excited to find out what this year holds. Stay tuned!

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