SMDH (is an example of what NOT to say, and also what I am doing)

Middle-aged people and social networking/texting/other internetly things.



This is an issue that has had me boggled for quite some time now. How parents/older relatives/coworkers...anyone of a certain age can be perfectly intelligent and composed people, and then they get on Facebook and lose ALL MANNER of grammar/spelling/punctuation/decorum. What is going on! These people are OLDER than me, they should be MORE likely to use correct syntax. Right?! These are the people, theoretically, who TAUGHT me how to use the English language. For some time, I was more than a little concerned that this was my future - once you reach the age of, I don't know, say 36? You completely forget everything you ever knew about corresponding properly, and suddenly find it acceptable to abbreviate three letter words. Clearly it's already happening to me. Do you SEE the number of commas I use? Holy moses.



And then, tonight, it hit me.



Someone on my Facebook posted a status about being taught to use Instagram by a 22 year old (Shoutout to that person! I don't remember who you are. Nor do I have any idea if you are actually older than me. If you're reading this, I'm not talking smack on you. In fact, I'm thanking you, because you brought me to this realization. Don't yell at me, I'm sensitive.). YOU GUYS! You're having people who are WAY TOO YOUNG teach you how to internet! Don't have your teenage niece teach you how to use Twitter! You're gonna be hashtagging every word and tweeting about what you ate for breakfast in no time! Don't have your 12 year old son teach you what to write on Facebook, no one REALLY wants the answer to the (non) question "TRUTH IS?". FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, don't EVER say "lol" un-ironically. It's not 2003. And probably don't do it ironically either, you're too old for that shit.



I'd say, to be safe, have someone over the age of 25 and under the age of 40 teach you how to properly behave on social networking sites. And when in doubt, just pretend you're talking to a friend on the phone, and type out that conversation using proper English and full words. You don't have to be overly formal, but you DO need to punctuate your sentences. And dear, DEAR lord, please do not EVER take a picture of yourself standing in front of a mirror. PLEASE.



Love you mom!