Tough Love

I've been taking a break from blogging (as you've probably noticed), but I've been noticing a pattern lately (or rather, again) of relentless negativity on social media, and I feel the need to address it. It's really...kind of upsetting. Sad. And unnecessary. And it's mostly with people around my age (I grudgingly give a little leniency towards younger people, as they have a tendency to be a tad dramatic), which I find to be alarming. By no means do you need to have your entire life figured out by 30 - or even have your shit together - but if you're still throwing your hands in the air and crying defeat over every little bump in the road by the end of your 20's, I'm afraid you're in for a tough life.

I refuse to believe that the number of people I'm acquainted with with truly terrible lives needs to be counted on more than one hand. I understand that shitty things happen, and sometimes you'll come across shitty people. But dudes, we're grownups. You learn from these things and move on. If every person you encounter is letting you down, then you need to start encountering different kinds of people. If every job you've had turns out in some kind of a disaster, it's not the job that's the problem.

Look, I'm not trying to be some kind of Mary Poppins motivational speaker nag. I'm just saying...okay, maybe I am. You want a better life? Quit your bitching. Do something about it. Change things. You're not helpless, or powerless. Don't just let things happen to you. You want good luck? You have to make good luck happen.

I'm always talking about how lucky I've been. And it's true, I've had several fortunate things happen to me. But you know what? I would absolutely not be where I am today if I went through life with a shitty "whoa is me" attitude. Several years ago, my life was kind of a bummer. I was broke, I was lonely, I was physically in a place I didn't want to be. And I know that if everything seems like a mess, it can be hard to get out of that hopeless state of mind. But listen to me. YOU HAVE TO. You just have to. Because no one wants to help someone who won't help themselves. No one wants to be around someone who's just going to complain about how the world is plotting against them all day. Grow up. Get rid of the losers in your life. Don't BE one of the losers yourself. And don't just talk about it on Facebook (actually, scrap the 'just'.) Get rid of them, get rid of their friends, get rid of anyone like them. Find new friends. Find a new love interest. Or actually, don't. Learn how to be self sufficient, and then maybe think about letting someone in. And sorry, but if your family is bringing you down? Distance yourself from them. This is your life. You're in charge. Don't hang around negative people. They're bumming you out, and you're bumming everyone else out.

Stop blaming the economy and the government on everything. I'm bored with it. Empower yourself. Be responsible. Stop calling out of work. Have a good attitude and work hard, and you'll be successful. That's it. People suck these days. Responsibility and good attitude is a shockingly precious commodity. Don't have a job where you can advance? Go work somewhere else that you can. Can't get a job? Why can't you get a job? Fix whatever's causing that. Go back to school, or don't. I'm a firm believer that if you work hard you can make a very reasonable living without a college education, but by all means if you feel that getting a degree will help you, go for it. Take advantage if your workplace offers tuition reimbursement.

You hate where you live? You have no opportunity there? Move. Oh, you have family? That's cool, they'll still be your family if you move. Don't whine about where you live if you're not willing to do anything about it. Where you live is literally 100% in your control.

Men/women suck? Um, yeah. People are the worst. Be celibate. No? That's silly? Okay, stop dating assholes. Everyone you date is alike? Lucky you! You get to choose who you spend your time with. You're not 20 anymore. Don't be an idiot. If you break up with someone every other week, don't marry them. Why would you marry someone you clearly can't maintain a relationship with? That's literally what marriage is. Maintaining a relationship. FOR LIFE! If you can't stay with someone for more than six months straight, why on earth do you think a shitty ring will cause you to do so? It won't. Don't have a child with someone you don't even like as a person, and then expect this person to be a good parent. That makes no sense. Stop it. And then when you do it, stop complaining about it. You knew this was going to happen.

Finally, stop airing your dirty laundry on Facebook. WE ARE ADULTS NOW. Adults! What good is going to come of announcing every bad thing that happens in your life to casual acquaintances? No one is going to take you seriously. People seriously do use social media to screen job applicants now. That's a well known fact. If you sound like a whiny teenager, no one is going to hire you. Quality people aren't going to want to associate with you. You're adding to what is apparently already not working. Cut it out. Believe me, I know that writing things down helps when you're upset. Start a blog. That way only people that want to read it will, and maybe you'll actually get some constructive feedback. Or hey. Be old school and write in a journal (if you can do that...personally, my hand cramps up after about 5 words these days). Open a word doc and write in that. Whatever! Just don't use Social Media. You know better, I know you do.

Please rest assured that this is not directed at any specific person. I just read about the 40th sad sack Facebook post in the past week and just about lost my mind. This is also not at all why I've been taking a blogging break...though QUITE annoying, this isn't anything that I'm normally extremely preoccupied with. And I know I got a little rant-y there, but my original intention was to just say...hey. It doesn't have to be so hard. Life is legitimately wonderful. Stop lamenting the negative and take a minute to appreciate the positive. If you enjoy the good things you have, life is a pleasure. If you dwell on the things you wish were different and don't even attempt to change them, life is a huge drag. Don't waste your time. Quit being a martyr. Why? I just don't understand why anyone wouldn't want to be happy. It's flabbergasting to me.

Love you guys, for real! Pretend this post is coming from Grooby. You can't be mad at that face! I mean, come on.

How to Kick Seasonal Depression

I wrote this post on Seasonal Affective Disorder a year ago today. Last year was a brutal winter - tons and tons of snow combined with shockingly cold temperatures made it a hard year around here for just about everyone. I get to feeling down right around the middle of January every year, and typically stay that way until around the beginning of March, but last year it was worse than normal for me and it led me to brainstorm some ways to head it off at the pass this year. When I look at the way I felt this time last year compared to how I've been feeling this year, it's like night and day. There are some things that contributed to that that I don't really have control over - the weather's been much more mild this year, for example, but I thought I'd share some tips that I feel have contributed to my sunnier outlook this year.

1. I feel like this is the most important thing out of all of these to do - stay active - During winter, I tend to go into hibernation mode and curl up under a blanket, leaving only to go to work and to take bathroom trips. It seems cozy at the beginning of winter, but quickly leads to feeling sluggish and bummed out. I think it's important to try to do some kind of actual activity each day - be it a project around the house or a trip to the grocery store, just moving around will make you feel better.
2. On a related note, be productive - This past Saturday I was sitting in my kitchen, doing what I love to do (sipping coffee, playing on the internet), no worries or cares, when I felt that bummed out feeling start to creep in out of nowhere. I immediately hopped out of my chair and begin cleaning my kitchen, which led to me deep cleaning my appliances and scrubbing my floors. The distraction took over the bummed feeling, and when I was finished my kitchen was sparkling clean, which also improved my mood! Two birds with one stone! I think that a big part of my depression problem stems from boredom, so just getting up immediately and doing something fended off the gloom. And the feeling of accomplishment is hard to beat.
3. Think about exercising - That's all I've done, and it's helped me! (Har, har)
4. Get outside - I know it's freezing out there and it feels torturous at first, but pick a sunny day and do something that involves being outside for a little while - take a walk, go to a winter festival, shovel your driveway if you have snow, build a snowman. The fresh air will breathe some life into you and the exposure to the sun is vital if you get seasonal depression.
5. Socialize - It's so easy to get wrapped up in your own little solitary cocoon when the weather is awful and you just want to lounge in sweats and watch Netflix, but social interaction can be really refreshing. It'll also get you out of your head a bit, which is always good.
6. Plan ahead - Plan a couple of fun activities to look forward to throughout the winter. Whether it's a trip to somewhere warm or just a night out with friends, having something to be excited for definitely staves off gloomy feelings.
7. Bring some life into your home - I'm not talking about making babies, though if you wanna go in that direction it's definitely a mood lifter (heh). I'm talking about foliage - get some green, living things (plants, flowers, trees) and scatter them throughout your house. It brightens everything up and improves the oxygen in your home. Try not to get too bummed when you inevitably kill them. And by "you", I most definitely don't mean "me".
8. Bring spring inside - I like to do this by punching up my decor a bit with some bright throw pillows or knick knacks and lighting some fresh-smelling candles. This is one of my favorite fresh, floral scents.
9. Buy a car - just kidding. But if you have several thousand dollars to just throw around or, ya know, if your car unexpectedly dies on you one day, it definitely doesn't hurt!
10. Spice it up - I've been trying out a bunch of new recipes recently, and the variety has helped keep things interesting. Again with the boredom - keeping my mind active has helped distract me from feeling bummed.
11. Set yourself up for success - Around midway last year, I opened a savings account specifically for Christmas gifts. A big part of my funk in January has to do with feeling guilty for spending too much on Christmas and having to pay off my credit cards for the next several months. By tucking away a small amount each month (I actually put a bigger chunk into my main savings account, and have a smaller part of that chunk automatically transferred from my main savings into the Christmas account each month) I'm able to save up a pretty generous amount by Christmas, and I don't even notice it's gone. Plus, if I end up not needing as much as I have saved I can either just transfer the rest back into my main savings or carry it over for the next holiday season. Having money set aside took a huge amount of stress off of me this January.

I hope everyone's having a decent winter, or if you're feeling down in the dumps I hope some of these tips are able to help, at least a little. Depression sucks, seasonal or not, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. If all else fails, know that you're definitely not alone and there's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Et cetera et cetera, corny corny.

2014 Wrap-Up

Happy 2015, everyone!

When I look back on my year, at first it seems like not much has changed from this time last year - which is fine, because the previous year was a huge transition and I started last year with plans on de-stressing and resetting. But then I read my "resolution" post from last year, and I realized that even though things are physically pretty similar to the way they were last January, mentally I'm in a totally different place.

I kind of forgot how weird I felt around this time last year. My life had gone through a major change, and I had done a lot of growing up in a very short period, so I felt uncomfortable in my skin and I had a lot of guilt issues about "abandoning" friends. I was also going through a major period of FOMO, but was in denial about it. I was really happy to be where I was, but I just felt weird about it. I felt displaced.

This year, I spent a lot of time reconnecting with myself, and reconnecting with Jeff. I didn't feel disconnected from him, per se, but this year we spent a lot more quality time together, and I feel closer to him than I ever have. Things have been a lot less stressful over the past year than they had been in the past, and it's been good to just be able to appreciate the good things in life without having to worry about a ton of other stuff. Not to say life was terrible before, or that we were going through anything particularly difficult, but things just feel very calm and stable right now, and it's nice.

Since the previous year had felt so chaotic, I had a pretty big list of goals for this past year, but they were pretty general. I'm not going to set specific goals for this year, because I don't feel like anything needs major change, and instead I'm going to just focus on appreciating the good things and taking advantage of my time doing things I enjoy and spending time with people I love. Pretty simple stuff.  Anyway, to address my goals from last year:

The first major "goal" I had was to get back on track with a healthy lifestyle. Results? We'll say, "Meh". I definitely didn't eat any healthier than I had been, but I wasn't a total train wreck about it, either (at least until the holidays hit). As far as working out every day before work...that was a joke. I didn't do that once. Not one time. It was too much work, having to bring my work clothes, keep them from getting wrinkled, lugging my makeup and hair stuff to the gym, attempting to shower in the locker room, etc. etc. It just wasn't happening. And that 12-9 schedule had me miserable. Remember that seasonal depression post? That was in the middle of that awful schedule. I do legitimately get seasonal depression, but that schedule was not helping by any means. It felt like my entire day was totally eaten up. Once I was on a more reasonable schedule, I did start going to the gym after work, and that went as it almost always does: I'd have a two or so month stretch where I'd go every day, I'd get busy and stop going for a month or two, and then I'd start going regularly again, and the cycle would repeat. My last cycle ended around November, and I officially decided to give up for the duration of the holiday season, but I'll go back in January and try to continue as frequently as possible throughout the year. It definitely does make a difference in the way I feel, and my schedule should be consistent this year so it should be a lot easier.

And then there was the social thing. I already mostly covered that, but I really am in a much better place mentally than I was last year. I spend a lot more time at home, but I feel totally fine with that now. When I do spend time with friends, I enjoy it a lot more because it feels more like an event than an every day occurrence. I finally feel like most of my friends are on the same page with me, so I don't feel guilty about leaving them behind and I don't feel left out of their lives. Not to mention I'm saving a ton of money by not going out three nights a week...though I have developed a bit of a shopping addiction. Maybe THAT should be a resolution.

The house thing...that's another "Meh." I got pretty much nothing on that list accomplished, but I don't really feel bad about it. When we first moved in, I was super hyper about making everything perfect right away and I was also reading a lot of DIY/home improvement blogs, which were making me feel like a total renovation loser. Our house the way it is right now is beautiful. It's not perfect, but it's home. I did decorate gradually over the year, and of course I'm always working on that. I still need to get our guest room done, because I hate making people crash on our third floor when they stay. The office is on pause, because we're not sure a dedicated office space is totally necessary. I still want to do the stuff I mentioned before like paint the staircase and semi re-do the kitchen, but I'm not really in a rush. We got our windows done, which was huge, and we got our heating situation resolved. I don't know if I mentioned this, but we're getting our roof re-done for free due to some hail damage from last spring, which is freaking amazing. That's going to happen next week. We do have official goals set for next spring/summer: our main goal is our exterior, which is a mess. Jeff's determined to make it functional and nicer looking, and of course I'm all for it as well. He's also determined to put a new, heated floor in our main bath because we get hardly any heat in there, so when we do that we're going to re-paint it as well. I'd also like to re-tile our shower and/or get a new sink/vanity, but we'll see. It's not a necessity. Smaller things we've done include putting a new faucet in the upstairs bathroom, putting a new rug in the living room, scoring my precious sideboard in the dining room, and mulching around our driveway (except we didn't maintain that, and now our work is pretty much ruined. And when I say "our work", I mean Jeff and our neighbor Liam's brother.) All in all, I think we did pretty well for our experience level and budget. We got a little lazy, but that's okay. Oh, and I still need to put stuff on the damn walls, but I have a pretty concrete plan worked out for that. More to come.

I guess that was it, other than "take more pictures". I guess I included that in my house goals. I'm still kind of bad at remembering to take pictures and I'm really weird about asking people to pose or asking strangers to take pictures of us, and I'm kind of (really) bad at taking candids that look like anything, but I'm trying to get better. I bought a "grown up" camera, and have been working on learning how to use it effectively, and I have photoshop now, so I'm thinking about taking an online photo-editing class. I'm happy that I've started blogging on a consistent schedule, and I'm going to try to improve on content.

All in all, it was a pretty great year, and I'm excited to see what 2015 has in store. Thanks for reading, and happy new year!

New Year, New Whatever

This year is going to be different.

I don't mean that in a resolution-y way; I'm not doing resolutions this year. I always say that, but this year, I'm not even doing the thing where I list out my goals/things to improve upon (or, y'know, resolutions) that I usually do. I mean it in an actual way, in that this year is going to be different than past years, and I have no control over that fact.

Right before I left work for my holiday break, I found out that I've been accepted for a new position that I had applied for, effective pretty much immediately upon returning to work. Which is awesome, awesome, awesome. However, this new position comes with a different schedule - my dream schedule, actually: Monday thru Friday, off by 5 PM every day. I've been dreaming of such a schedule ever since I took my first serving job and have been on random (sometimes nightmarish) schedules ever since. But! I've been on some iteration of my current schedule (which is Tuesday thru Saturday; hours have varied over time but are currently daytime hours) for such a long time that I've gotten so used to it that I'm a little apprehensive about it changing, no matter how "ideal" the new schedule is. On my current schedule, Jeff and I each have one "alone day", where we have the house to ourselves during the day and can spend it doing whatever we please (I usually go the thrilling route of cleaning the house and cooking an elaborate dinner, because I'm a 1950's housewife, apparently), and one day off to spend together, which has been pretty ideal. Plus, my "alone day" always fell on a Monday, which means if I had errands to run I had the whole world to myself, with everyone else at school/work. It was lovely, and I had gotten so used to it that I all but refuse to enter a grocery store/the mall/any public place during busy weekend hours.

So, it will take some adjusting. It's not all bad, though. I've also considered the fact that we'll now be able to actually take weekend trips on occasion without one of us having to take time off work, and we can spend a weekend here or there at the beach (or "down the beach", as the locals say) like the entire rest of the Delaware population during the summer if we so choose. I can also start making trips to the farmer's market that I used to work at when I was with Drip on Saturday mornings, which was a no-go previously since I always had to work. Most of my friends aren't really on normal schedules because a lot of them are nurses or servers or have other careers that involve shift work, but it still FEELS like everyone has normal weekends off, and I've always felt like somewhat of the odd man out (more so when I had to work Friday or Saturday nights, but still.)

Anyway, I hope everyone had a great holiday. Ours was SUPER relaxing (to the point of where we had to leave the house yesterday for dinner and a movie, because we both felt cabin fever creeping in even though we technically were traveling for several hours the day before). For the first time in...five? years, Jeff and I are staying in by ourselves this New Year's Eve, and I'm actually pretty excited to spend a cozy night eating finger foods, drinking champagne, and watching the ball drop in our PJs. I'll be back to regular posting next week, and may or may not be back before then with some kind of a year-end wrap up post; I haven't decided yet. If not, I hope everyone has a safe, fun and happy New Year's Eve!

Yoga Breaths

As you may have noticed, I have a tiny, little bitty temper problem. I am naturally (I guess), for some reason, pretty short on patience, and it takes very little for me to fly off the handle. Unfortunately for my sanity, I am also pretty passive-aggressive, so instead of just blowing up, I internalize my lunatic urges. Recently, in some situations I've noticed that I can actually feel my blood pressure rising. I get light headed and tense, and I can actually feel my blood coursing through my veins. That ain't good, folks. So before I hulk out (or drop dead), I've decided it might be in my best interest to look into some stress-relievers.

I once mentioned to one of my work colleagues that if I'm speaking to someone particularly heinous that I have to "take yoga breaths". She found that hilarious, but that's a thing I actually do. I take long, deep breaths in through my nose and out through my mouth, and if I focus on my breathing, it tends to slow my heart rate and calm me down a bit.

Does anyone have any good tips on how to de-stress in an aggravating situation? Or, better yet, on how to prevent things from getting to you in the first place? I always thought of myself as a laid-back person when I was younger, but in the more recent years I've come to the conclusion that I was flat-out wrong and that I'm super high-strung. I'd love to be one of those people who just laughs when something goes wrong, but I just get tense so easily. Luckily, these feelings don't hang out for too long, so as quickly as I was triggered, I'll be happy as a clam again 20 minutes later. Is this sort of thing something that's just part of who you are, or can you tailor your personality to become more go-with-the-flow? It's definitely worth looking into.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Every year on Thanksgiving I get a tiny bit bummed that I can't be with my family for most holidays, but I'm immediately reminded of how lucky I am to have been welcomed into such a warm and accepting (and hilarious!) family right here. Jeff's family has treated me as one of their own since the first time I walked into his mom's house and she greeted me by saying she wasn't going to bother to learn my name. But I stuck around, and even though she told me repeatedly to get out while I could, six Thanksgivings have passed and now it seems as though I'm stuck with these lunatics. And I couldn't be happier.

I really am so incredibly lucky to be where I'm at in life right now, and even though I don't tend to yap all over social media about what I'm thankful for every day of November, I'm constantly asking myself how I ended up so fortunate. I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving and enjoys and appreciates the time with their loved ones. I'm pumped for a nice loud day filled with laughs and tons (seriously, A LOT) of mashed potatoes.

Thanks to you, too, for reading!

Summer catch-up

I've been neglecting the blog again, so let's catch up.

I've been trying to take a new approach to things lately. It's occurred to me that we only have so much time, and I want to soak up as much life as possible while I'm here. I know that this way of thinking usually occurs when one's experienced some sort of loss or terrible news, but don't worry! Nothing like that has happened to me recently. I just realized that I spend too much time not really doing anything, and while I LOVE to not do anything (let's be honest, here), I want to experience more. So I've been making a conscious effort to get out more, do things I enjoy, and try not to worry as much about everything. 

As far as the house goes, we've been making little bits of progress every here and there. I've spent a lot of time feeling guilty about not moving more quickly, probably mostly because I read a lot of home improvement blogs where they're almost constantly doing projects, but I've come to terms with the fact that I'm NOT a home improvement blogger, and I don't NEED to do projects constantly. I'm pretty happy with the way my house looks right now, and it's okay to slowly improve/tweak things over time. Once I told myself that, I've felt better about moving at our own pace, however slow that may be. We finally ordered our windows yesterday, which is pretty major...we had to custom order them because our house, being old, doesn't have standard dimensions. They'll be ready by the end of the month, and I'm pretty excited. We ended up ordering a different style than what we currently have, and I'm pumped to see what they look like once they're installed. More on that when it happens. We'll also be hosting Thanksgiving again this year and my mom may come stay with us, so we finally pulled the plug and bought primer and supplies to get started on the guest room. I'll do my best to keep up to date with the guest room progress, because I'm pretty excited about that project (the windows, on the other hand...will be a learning experience). Some other little things we've done include starting to mulch along our driveway and cutting down the hydrangea which I apparently killed (RIP, sweet hydrangea). We've been here for about a year and a month now, and I had planned on doing a before and after tour at the one year mark, but clearly that didn't happen. I'll try to work on a house tour once the windows are in.

One of the main things I want to do more of is traveling. I'm finally at a point where I'm able to do some traveling, and I want to take advantage as much as possible. There are so many places that I'd love to visit, both within the country and internationally - the biggest being the Greek Isles, Spain, France and England. I didn't travel much growing up, so I haven't been to many places, especially outside of the country. I'm starting on the small side with a few road trips, but just to get out and about feels fantastic. Last weekend, Jeff and I took a quick trip to Washington, DC, which is pretty local for us - just about two hours away. We had both been before, and it was a last minute snap decision to go, but we had a pretty nice little day. We started with a lunch of fresh fish sandwiches for lunch from the Wharf with one of Jeff's good friends, Steve. Jeff doesn't get to see him often, so it was great to catch up. We didn't have anything planned, so we just spent the rest of the day wandering around and popping into some of the Smithsonians. The last time we went, our day was pretty rigidly scheduled, so it was nice to just do whatever we felt like. We ended up at this neat little restaurant called the Carving Room for dinner - it's half cocktail bar/tap room, half deli. They cure all of their meats in house, and the menu is mostly deli - style sandwiches with a Moroccan flair. I got this awesome poblano/crispy pastrami/fried egg monstrosity and Jeff had a grilled cheese piled high with their badass pastrami. I decided to be fancy and get a crazy cocktail (I'm a huge beer drinker and when a restaurant has a great beer list I usually have a hard time passing it up) with mezcal and ginger and chipotle syrup. It was really bizarre - very smoky from the mezcal and chipotle, and really spicy. It was very savory. Interesting, but I would definitely order something else next time. 

 

We have a few more trips planned before the summer ends - for Labor Day weekend, we'll be going to visit Jeff's friend Daisy in Newport News, VA, and at the end of September we'll be taking our yearly trip to my hometown of Jamestown, NY. I turn 30 (lord almighty) on December 12th, so I've decided I want to go somewhere for my birthday weekend; specific location TBD. And of course, we'll be visiting my mother in central Pennsylvania for Christmas, as always. We have a busy, fun remainder of the year coming up, and I'm really excited to be able to relax with sufficient time off this holiday season for the first time in as long as I can remember.

Jeff and I celebrated six years of being together this Fourth of July. Six YEARS! I know couples who met, got married, and then got divorced in less time. I guess you can say we really take the whole "slow and steady wins the race " thing to heart! All joking aside, though, I can't imagine having spent the past six years with anyone else, or the next six, for that matter. The Fourth is always a bit of a challenge (I guess), because we have to choose between doing holiday stuff or anniversary stuff. I'd actually had to work the past several years, so we usually don't really end up doing much of anything...we're pretty low-key as far as "anniversaries" go (we did say we went to Mexico for our fourth anniversary, but that was more coincidence than anything). This year, we ended up pretty low-key again; we just went out for a nice dinner and decided to skip the crowds and wander around our neighborhood looking for fireworks (we were unsuccessful). It may sound boring, but it was actually a really nice night. 

I'll do my best to be a little better about updating, especially since we have a few pretty big projects and lots of little adventures in the works. For now, here are a few iPhone pictures I've taken over the past couple months. (My camera situation will be improving soon as well: I'm investing in a 'grown up' camera in a couple of months and I'm finally upgrading my iPhone from my 4s in September.) Hope everyone's been having a great summer!

Who knew?

I just found out that Jessica Alba is the co-founder of The Honest Company, which makes great all-natural products for your home and children. And after reading this article, she actually seems really down to earth and cool. It made me want to be her friend. Who knew?

Plus, that hair!! She is so damn pretty.

Easy breezy

I love weekends, man. This one in particular was super nice. The weather was great (it got into the 60's! After this brutal winter, it felt like the tropics), and I spent the weekend just kicking back and enjoying the downtime and the sun that we actually got. On Sunday, our good friends the Drakes joined us for brunch with their beautiful little happy baby boy, and it was really nice to just drink mimosas and catch up with friends. Today I'm lounging in my kitchen, basking in the sun and making turkey chili. I'm ready for spring, and I can't wait to spruce this place up with some fresh flowers and plants and some bright accents. I also really want to invest in a really nice porch swing (actually, want I want is called a "porch bed" - it's a really deep porch swing covered in a plush cushion) this year and make the most of our awesome porch. Warm weather needs to hurry up and get here! Here are some photos from this weekend...

Winter blues

I know, I haven't been keeping my promise to myself to blog more. And this is going to be another non-funny/entertaining post. But I feel like writing is cathartic, and can be kind of a breath of fresh air, which I need.

 Seasonal depression has hit me pretty hard this year. I feel weird talking openly about it, I guess because it makes me feel vulnerable (and who likes that?), and also because it feels like such a stupid, unimportant thing to complain about. There are so many people with REAL problems, probably people that occasionally read this blog, and I feel guilty somehow, almost like I'm burdening other people with my feelings. And I keep telling myself that it isn't a "real" problem, because there's nothing actually wrong, but it IS a real problem. And it's a problem that I think a LOT of people share with me. I usually don't even realize that the reason I feel the way I do is seasonal until someone else points it out, and then I remember feeling the same way around this time for years prior. And when it's over, I go back to normal so quickly and so completely that I totally forget it ever happened.



I don't know about anyone else who gets legitimate seasonal depression, but the way that it happens to me is that it creeps up. I'll think I'm bummed about having spent too much money during Christmas, or that Christmas is over in general, or I'll think that it's PMS. But then it doesn't go away, and I'll start feeling nuts. The weird thing is that I can kind of look at myself from the outside and I KNOW that I'm not unhappy. I am 100 percent aware that there is nothing legitimately wrong. So, being the super-logical person that I am, there's a deep need inside of me to explain the bummed-out feeling that I have. So I'll start micro-analyzing every tiny thing that's wrong in my life that really doesn't bother me on a normal day-to-day basis, and all of a sudden every tiny (NORMAL) flaw in my life seems like the end of the world. And I don't want to feel bad anymore, because I remember the way that I normally feel, which is really really good. So, in trying to get my normal super happy feelings back, I start feeling the need to SOLVE every tiny problem in my life, but most of the things that I'm getting upset about aren't things that can be easily fixed. Everyone has little things in their life that aren't ideal. That's just the way it is. So then what started out as a mild case of the bummed-outs becomes this huge existential crisis. The worst part of it is that I know that all of this is temporary and that it's not really how I feel, but I can't make the feeling stop, and it makes me feel crazy. I NEED to have a source of the crappy feelings I'm having, so that I can "solve" the "problem". So I start blaming myself for things that I can't change, or I start getting on Jeff's case for things that he does that don't really bother me that much normally, and then I ACTUALLY feel bad, because now I'm making OTHER people unhappy, and nothing can be done from anyone else's end to make ME feel more happy, because the source of my unhappiness is purely chemical (except now it's also because I feel like an asshole). So it's kind of a vicious cycle and it just keeps piling up. And then it eventually just goes away, and I feel normal again.



My question is, does anyone else get bad seasonal depression? I know a lot of people get kind of bummed this time of year, but does anyone else start feeling nuts? And if so, do you do anything to alleviate the way you feel? I'm at a loss, and I don't know what I can do to make myself feel better, aside from medication (and that's not a road I want to go down, since this is so temporary and depression/anxiety meds can be pretty addictive). Jeff suggested maybe trying light therapy, and I responded "like a lizard?" It sounds so weird to me, but maybe it's worth a shot. I know that I can ride it out and I'll feel better eventually, but I feel like I'm just wasting a big chunk of my year, and I don't feel okay making Jeff feel like crap for no reason. He's a fixer, and when he can't fix things he feels awful. Honestly, just writing about it really did help, and I feel at least slightly less crazy. At the very least, if anyone else is feeling like a big bag of crazy and has kept it inside because you feel ridiculous, now you know you're not the only one. Seasonal depression is no joke.

What up, 2014?

Whew. I'm not normally huge on the whole "New year, new me" hoopla, and I don't usually set specific resolutions, but this new year really feels like a breath of fresh air. This past year spun a little out of control and I got a little off-base, so I'm looking forward to reset and refresh a bit. I feel like I'm in a really great place for 2014 to be the best year yet (I said before that every year gets better and better, and I stand by that), and so I've set some goals (RESOULTIONS, if you will) for myself to stay on track. I kinda started off with broad, general goals, and then set smaller, more specific plans on how to get there. Here's what I'm looking to do this year:

Get back on track with a healthy lifestyle.

I don't diet. I used to when I was younger, and then I got smarter and wiser and realized that diets are stupid and don't work for the long-term, and are also generally pretty unhealthy. So I usually just try to be generally healthy about the way I eat and stay as natural as possible, and if I want to eat something greasy and fatty and delicious REALLY BAD, then I eat it. In moderation, if possible (sometimes you just have to eat a whole pizza. It happens.) About halfway through the year, I got busy and stopped really paying attention to what I was eating and how I was eating, and I pretty much completely stopped working out. And now I feel like crap (physically). Time to get back to it. Here's what I'm gonna do:

1. Work out every day before work (at least four days a week). 

I now have a gym AT work, which gives me exactly ZERO excuses not to get there. And for at least the first few months of the year, I'll be working from 12 pm - 9 pm, so before work seems like the best plan. I've found over the past year that I'm actually kind of a morning person (believe me, I was just as shocked as you are at this realization). Getting my butt out of bed is difficult at times, but once I'm out, morning is my favorite time of the day. So I want to start an actual routine, so that it becomes like clockwork. This may have to be adjusted according to my schedule (I'm trying to get rid of the late shit as quickly as possible), and I'm giving myself one day a workweek wiggle room just to set myself up for success.

2. Eat (pretty much) only stuff that I feel good about eating.

I thought about this, and at first I was going to try to be a lot more specific, but if I pay attention to what I'm doing, I'm usually pretty good about this one without having to give myself actual rules (which makes it a lot easier to stick to). My only specific rule is no commercial soda (meaning I can still drink natural, carbonated beverages like club soda with a splash of fruit juice) and no fast food if AT ALL avoidable, both of which I've already basically eliminated from my diet (though I started slipping a bit with the soda rule over the holidays). So this means that I try to keep my diet about 80% natural, I try to stick to healthy fats (though I need to work on moderating my healthy fat intake, meaning not eating avocado on literally EVERYTHING and eggs by the pound), and I try to limit my red meat consumption to a few times a month and my meat consumption in general to a couple times a week. This should be a lot easier no longer working at a steakhouse, and no longer BAKING FOR A LIVING. I was seriously worried that I was going to give myself diabetes when I was having to constantly taste batters and doughs.

3. Try to be more active, in general.

I felt I had to add this one because I'm going from being on my feet 70% of the day every day to sitting at a desk staring at a computer all day, every day. When I was serving, I felt justified to spend all of my leisure time vegging on the couch watching tv or sitting in a bar. Now that I'm a lot less active in general, I'm going to try doing more active stuff just for fun (and I'm going to try to convince Jeff to join me, which will be a feat in and of itself). I want to start trying new stuff, exploring more, and being outside more. I'm not going to bother pushing myself to get outside more when it's cold because I just don't have the capacity for it and it's not gonna happen, but at least when it starts warming up I'd like to get out more. I'd really like to buy a couple bikes and start riding around.

Figure out what my idea of "fun" actually means.

Okay, this one's pretty vague. I say this because my life has changed so drastically in the past year, that I still think that I need to be doing the same things I used to do to have fun, and I don't even realize it when I'm enjoying myself a lot of the time. I don't have the time, energy, or honestly the money to "go out" the way I used to, and if I really think about it, I don't WANT to. I was actually really bored with it, and was probably well on my way to getting into some kind of trouble (or at least people thinking I was a fool). That certainly doesn't mean that I'm going to stop drinking altogether, or that I'm never going to go to a bar again, but I need to stop thinking that I'm missing out when nothing that exciting is really happening.

1. Spend more time with people I really and truly enjoy, and stop trying so hard to make friends with everyone I meet.

I don't want this to sound like people that I'm acquaintances with suck, or that I don't appreciate them. All I mean by this is that I've met so many people over the past 10 years that it's dizzying. Between all of the moving I've done and all of the various jobs I've had, I've come across way more "new" people than probably most people my age have, so I've gotten into this mode where I'm just constantly trying to make new friends with EVERYONE, because I'm used to it being necessary. I'm not AGAINST making new friends if I click with someone or if I have a lot in common with them, but I seem to collect groups of people that I have literally nothing in common with and have nothing to really talk about, and then I feel bad about neglecting them when I don't have time to hang out with everyone I know. I have a solid number of people that I truly enjoy spending time with, and I want to dedicate more time to them and developing (or re-developing) solid friendships and less to hanging out with people I don't really even know, or that are half my age and make me feel old and lame. Which leads to...

2. Stop feeling so guilty.

Going from young-adulthood, where your friends are EVERYTHING in life, to full-blown adulthood, where your family becomes your main focus, is hard, and I'm having growing pains. It's hard to get over the idea of your group of friends being your entire support network and knowing where you are and what you're doing and what you're thinking every minute. In fact, just writing that with the assumption that it's no longer true is making me feel guilty. I have that thing that a lot of women have where I feel like I have to be everything to everyone in my life, and I get spread so thin that I'm never really there with anyone. I need to get used to the fact that I'm just going to spend less time with friends, and start really taking advantage of the time that I DO get to spend with them. And when I'm not with them, I need to stop feeling like I'm abandoning them and feeling guilty for not being there for everything that happens. If something big happens, good or bad, I'll be there. That's what matters. And on the same note, I need to get used to my FRIENDS having families that are now THEIR main focus, and to not feel abandoned by them, or left out. I have to find a balance, and feel okay with it.

3. Create more.

Now that I'm pretty much set on the career front and don't have to constantly rack my brain trying to figure out what I want to DO with my life, I have a lot more time and energy to actually be creative. I've gotten really into design over the past year, and I want to make my home beautiful and personal. This could mean painting, or DIY projects, or home improvement projects. I also (as I mentioned) want to get back into blogging consistently, so I'm going to try for at least 3 times a week. And of course, I'm excited to get back into baking for fun.

Get back to making our house our home.

This one is the most self-explanatory, and was the most easy to set specific goals for. We got busy and complacent and completely stopped working on our house, and it still needs a LOT of work. Honestly, this place already feels like home to me (and I think to Jeff and Grooby as well), but I want to get the ideas I have to make this place my dream house into action. Here's what I want to have done by the end of the year (while trying to be realistic in a skills and budgetary sense):

1. Put stuff on the damn walls.

I have developed a phobia of hanging pictures. This is ridiculous. I think it dates back to technology class (what my middle school called "shop class") with Mr. Chitester (sp?). That guy terrified me, and the first thing he taught us was to properly measure. Somehow the terror that he instilled in me made me permanently afraid of measuring ANYTHING, and now that has projected onto being afraid of hanging pictures in the wrong place, and them not being straight, or evenly measured, and it looking like an unprofessional mess. This has lead to my walls being literally BARE. There is no art, or family pictures, or mirrors, or ANYTHING hung ANYWHERE. Anything that's on the walls was either already here, or hastily thrown up by Jeff when we moved in just to put it somewhere. I really noticed how detrimental this was to our home's overall feel during the holidays, when we were actually using our dining room. It's pretty much just a bare room with a table in the middle of it, and in pictures it looks TERRIBLE. It looks like we just moved in. We've been here for six months. I need to get over it, because mama loves her a gallery wall.

2. Get going on the office and guest room.

Other than taking that pile of junk out of the guest room (the pink room) and a mess and Jeff's clothes in the office (the blue room), those two rooms pretty much still look exactly like these pictures I took back in July. It's getting really old not having a functioning guest room (we've actually entertained way more than I thought we would), and Jeff really wants to have his own space in the form of the office, so I'm itching to whip these rooms into shape. I have specific goals for each room for this year, because both rooms need a bit more work than we can probably get done or budget for this year alone. As for the office, that carpet is probably going to stay for another year, because I think we're just going to re-do the whole upstairs floor all at once. So I want to get the carpet in the deep-cleaned, and then I want to get the room painted and at least get a desk in there. And obviously the window treatments (and closet "doors") need switched out. And as for the guest room, I'd like to get a large area rug in there to cover up the white painted floor, and get a bed and nightstands in there with fresh linens. I'm really excited to decorate in there, but I'm not really sure what I'm going to do yet. I'd like to have it painted and get those awful curtains out of there by spring. I think from there on out it will be pretty much smooth sailing.

3. The kitchen.

Oh, man. It makes me nervous writing this one down, but I feel like it gives me a little more of a push to actually get it done. I'm apprehensive about the kitchen. It'll be our first big undertaking as far as home improvement goes. But, I'm gonna say it. By the end of the year, I want to change the backsplash, which means I also want to have all of the walls painted. I'm not going to commit to ripping out the plaster by the end of the year just yet, but we'll see. And while we're doing the backsplash and the walls, I also want to take out the cabinet over the island and install open shelves. Being sandwiched next to the fridge and set directly over our island makes this cabinet almost impossible to access, and I love the look of open shelves to display dishes. I recently bought a set of simple white dishes, so I feel like I can actually display them out in the open now, which would really help my "my dishes are currently stored right in the middle of where all my food is, which doesn't make any sense" dilemma. And I'd really like to have my ever growing mug collection out in the open. I have no idea how any of this is going to go, but I'm jazzed about it, at least in theory.

4. Lighting.

There is exactly one lighting fixture in this house that I don't hate, and it's in our upstairs bathroom. All of the other ones got to GO. And the foyer and living room are both SCREAMING for lighting fixtures, because neither of them have one at all, in general. At the moment, my goal is to get a new pendant in the dining room by the holidays next year (probably sooner, because the one that's there now drives me bonkers), install a pendant in the foyer (however the hell you do that), get rid of the pastel ceiling fan in the guest room, and put in new lanterns outside. There's something wrong with the electrical outlets out there, so we'll have to figure that out, too. I want that figured out before summer (and certainly before next Christmas, because our neighbors put up Christmas lights this year and we couldn't, and our side of the house looked sad and forlorn).

There is a LOT of other stuff I want to get done to this place, but a lot of it is little stuff, and I want to try to be realistic about the big stuff. So I'm gonna stick with this, and consider anything else that gets done a bonus.

Take more pictures.

I don't really know if this fit in somewhere else, but I just remembered it and I feel very strongly about it. I LOVE having pictures, and I usually don't remember to take any until the last minute (or the last hour of a party, when all of the pictures that get taken are blurry and off-center and taken with my iPhone). I keep forgetting to ask for a good camera for Christmas, so it looks like I'm going to have to bite the bullet and buy one for myself. I want a grownup camera, not just a point-and-shoot digital crap camera, that takes beautiful pictures and actually captures moments. And I want to learn to use it. And then I want to ACTUALLY use it. And then I need to remember to actually have pictures printed. Now that we have a house to display pictures in, it'd be nice to actually have pictures to display.



So, those are my goals, both broad and specific, for the next year. I'm really excited to be able to gather myself and take a breath this year. It's nice to have a lot of my more major goals covered so that I can work on the little stuff and not have to stress out about huge milestones. I hope you guys enjoyed your holidays, and are as pumped for 2014 as I am. Cheers.

A typical night in the Genco-Raum household...

Right at this very moment, I'm laying on the couch sick reading blogs and eating shrimp florentine with my fingers, and Jeff is in the kitchen teaching Grooby how to make coffee.



Happy Wednesday, friends!

Oh god, what is this blog turning into?

I always tell myself that I don't do new year's resolutions, but I guess I kind of do.



The thing is, I think that by calling it a "resolution", it makes it easier to give up. Say you want to lose 10 pounds, and make it your resolution to do so. You start going to the gym January 2nd, and you start some stupid fad diet, and by January 28th you're over it. So you just say, "meh, it was just a resolution, who ever succeeds with those anyway?" and go on with your life. You're setting yourself up for failure.



Instead, I just try to continually improve my life, regardless of what exact plan I use. But I do kind of use January as a reset to gather my thoughts and get back on whatever path I may have been on before the holidays.



Some goals I have for the next year or so are as follows:

• First, the goal that EVERYONE makes: start going to the gym again, regularly. I'm not the HUGEST distance runner in the world, but I'd like to do maybe at least a couple 5ks this year. I'm also considering changing my gym to a little bit of a nicer one, which would make me want to go more. 
• My second goal kind of goes with my first goal: I want to start waking up a lot earlier, on a regular basis. I've noticed over the past year that the time I'm happiest is the time directly after I get up. I love to sit and drink a cup of coffee and maybe watch some food network. I'd like to start getting up early enough to go to the gym or for a run and then come home and decompress before starting my day. This will be an ongoing process, but I think it'll be worth it.
• Move my career forward. I've already started on this one, and am excited for what's to come. I'd like to get to a point some time in the near future (maybe not quite by the end of 2013, but soon) to where I don't have to wait tables at all anymore. 
• Buy a house. Or at least make some major progress in the direction of buying a house. Jeff and I started the process last spring, and then got busy and just kind of stopped. I want OUT of this apartment, and I refuse to move until we buy a house. I'm really excited to move into a place and really make it our home.
• Start doing some DIY projects. This is a LITTLE difficult, as I don't really have an outdoor area to spray paint/stain/etc, but I'll make do. I really want to do some DIY wall art, and maybe start hitting up some thrift stores for furniture projects. I'm hesitant to do this, as I have no interest in decorating our apartment anymore and nowhere to store anything, but I think having things to decorate/furnish our house with BEFORE we buy will help a lot.
• Continue to better my diet. Over the past two years, I've been eating a LOT healthier, and trying to cut way back on certain types of foods/drinks. Currently I've been following a pescatarian (vegetarian, but with seafood) diet about 4 out of 7 days a week. I don't know if I'll ever go totally vegetarian, but I've considered it (and actually did it when I was a teenager). I also completely stopped drinking soda (except for club soda) this past year, and have practically cut out deep-fried food (though if I'm really craving it, I'll eat a little every once in a while. Everything in moderation, yo!). I feel a LOT better since I've done this, and my skin looks about a million percent better. I just look at it as an on-going process, and try not to deprive myself of anything I'm REALLY craving, which makes it a lot easier to keep it up.
• Maintain my damn hair. I kid you not when I tell you that I literally did not cut my hair ONE TIME in 2012. Not even a trim. Nor did I do anything to the color, which would be fine except for the fact that it WAS colored to start with. Luckily, my...highlights? (I don't even remember what I did with the color the last time) weren't THAT different from my natural color, so I just jokingly tell everyone my hair is ombre...and I think sometimes people actually believe me. Anyway, I love my long hair and don't want to cut it, but I need a little shape or SOMETHING, and I need to at least get a single process done and stick with it. And get regular trims, so I don't look like a homeless person.
• Try to visit home more often (both my ACTUAL home - Jamestown, NY - and my mom, in Dubois, PA). I've only been to Jamestown once the ENTIRE time I've lived in Delaware, which has been four years this week. I go to Dubois more often, but I've really been missing my family lately. It only takes 4.5 hours to get to Dubois and about 6 hours get to Jamestown, and now that I have a relatively consistent work schedule I have no excuse not to drive up more frequently. My 10 year high school reunion is in June, so I'm already on my way.
• Last, and definitely least...get adult braces. Ugh. I've always wanted/needed to get braces, but put it off because I didn't have dental insurance and couldn't afford them...or at least that's what I told myself. Really, I just don't want to deal with it. But now I DO have dental, which will cover possibly the ENTIRE COST, plus my mom has offered to pay for it, even if I want to do invisalign (which I certainly DO, if it's possible). Just the thought of having braces for who knows how long makes me shudder, but it'll be WELL worth it in the long run. I really want to have a perfect smile in my wedding pictures, so I feel as though time is probably of the essence. 

So, there you have it. I'm sure I'll come up with some more stuff as the year goes on, but those are my most important goals for the time being. What do you hope to accomplish in 2013?

Quit harshing my mellow.

Let's talk about positivity, shall we?



Now, I am certainly not one to go after people about being negative. I am a pretty cynical person, and I most definitely wouldn't describe myself as "bubbly" or "inspiring". However, I see a TON of people around my age down in the dumps on a constant basis, and it's lame.



My life, relatively speaking, does NOT appear to be super ideal. I just turned 28, I literally have no career to speak of at the moment, and I don't really like my job. I live in a crappy apartment, I have very little savings, and my car has broken down at least 5 times in the past year. I'm not married, and I don't have kids (which could be seen as good OR bad, I guess). I live hours away from any and all family. Both of my grandparents died over the past couple of years, one in the past month. Despite all of this, I am EXTREMELY happy on a day-to-day basis. In fact, I told a friend this summer that every year, my life gets better and better. And I meant it.



If you are relatively healthy, and of sound mind and body, if your life is not continually improving regularly, you're doing something wrong. Or actually, you're probably not doing anything. At risk of stating the obvious, if there's something in your life that you don't like, CHANGE IT. Seriously. It's that easy. You have complete control over your life. Every day is a series of choices. Make the choices that will make you happy in the long-run.



Instead of sitting around feeling miserable, do something you like. You HAVE TO like something. If you don't, we have a whole 'nother issue. Do something that makes you happy, and really enjoy it. Don't just go through the motions, actually step back and recognize the happiness that you're feeling. Appreciate little things around you. Surround yourself with things that you like. If your house is a crazy mess and it's bumming you out, clean it. And then sit there and look around and enjoy how clean your house is. Does that sound stupid? Yup. Will it make you happier? Yup.



When you're legitimately upset, be upset. Cry. Recognize that there's an actual reason to be upset, and accept that it's alright to break down a little bit. Know that it will pass, and when it does, it'll be awesome. Don't fall apart when something inconsequential happens. Recognize actual problems from little bumps in the road.



Appreciate the good things in your life. Don't even think about letting yourself think that there's nothing good in your life. Someone is always worse off than you. Likely, MILLIONS of people are worse off, WAY worse off. Stop pouting, and change something. Feel sluggish and fat? Go for a run. Or a walk. Feel like a big jerk? Go do something nice for someone. Feel dumb? Read something informational. Watch a documentary. Take a class. Hate where you live? Move. Boyfriend's a jerk? Dump him. Change what you don't like. Seriously. It's not hard. I'm INCREDIBLY LAZY, and if I can do it, you can. I believe in you.

'Tis the season...

So, I fucking love Christmas.



(If I decide to revamp this blog to include baking and DIY and whatnot, do I have to stop swearing? I have a FOUL mouth. I don't like the idea of censoring myself. Hmm.)



Anyway, I love Christmas. I really love it. All of it. You know how most people say that going to the mall during the Christmas season puts them in a bad mood and makes them homicidal? It has the complete opposite effect on me. I LOVE the mall during the holidays. I love Christmas music (in moderation). And while I'm generally a music snob, I listen to THE MOST RIDICULOUS Christmas music. Hanson's "Snowed In" is my favorite Holiday album. Bieber? Sure! Taylor Swift? Heck yeah! I love Christmas decorations, especially the lights. I love eggnog. You KNOW I love to drink, and the holidays are an excuse to do so. Also, I love champagne (or sparkling wine, I guess), and I can drink it without feeling like a trashy housewife during the holidays. I like wrapping presents. I love spending time with family.  I could go on. I love, love, love Christmas. And my birthday is December 12th, so it falls right in with the Christmas festivities. This time of year makes me excited and wiggly like a puppy.



Anyway. Now that Thanksgiving is over and everyone is done yapping about what they're thankful for, I've decided to recognize some of the things that I'M thankful for (always gotta stand out, don't you Genco?). And I was to call to attention some of the smaller things that I'm thankful for/make me happy. Obviously you're thankful for your friends and job and family (unless you REALLY hate your job or have a REALLY AWFUL family, I guess). You already realize that, so to call it to attention most likely isn't going to make you feel any happier than you already do. I find that a lot of my happiness comes from getting REALLY UNREASONABLY EXCITED about the silly little things in life. Things that you would generally take for granted, or not really even notice. If you get really pumped about these things, there will be several instances over the course of the day where you'll actually feel really excited and happy. It sounds nuts and kind of dumb (and probably a little superficial), but try it. It works. For example, some of the things that I'm thankful for on a daily basis are:

• Coffee
• My pretty mugs from Anthropologie
• Cottage doubles
• Holiday specials on the Food Network
• TiVo
•  Seasonal drinks
• Coffee shops (particularly Brew Haha)
• Pretty nail polish colors (right now I'm really digging "The next CEO" by Nicole, which is a great gold color)
• J.Crew factory online
• Spotify
• Healthy snacks (I've been on a cucumber dipped in soy sauce or hard boiled egg kick)
• SheInside
• Sweaters
• Scarves
• Window shopping
• Red wine
• Breakfast
• DIY/Home decor blogs
• Baking blogs
• Fashion blogs
• Uggs (just to run errands in, shut up)
• Leggings
• My long hair, because I can just throw it in a top knot or a braid and go
• Happy hour with friends
• House hunting (also House HuntERS)
• The panic attacks I have every time I watch Homeland
• Christmas lights
• Glitter/gold anything
• Softlips
• e.l.f. cosmetics
• Craft beer
• Snow (ESPECIALLY in Delaware, I love how everything STOPS the second a flake falls)
• My bed
• Throw blankets
• Etsy
• Roadtrip singalongs with Jeffrey
• The fact that my boyfriend's family doesn't suck
• The fact that my friends and I STILL do things like holiday themed power-hours and flip cup, even though we're almost 30.
• Outdoor festivals (Italian fest, Oktoberfest, music festivals, etc)
• Baby clothes that look like adult clothes
• Our annual New Years day celebration
• Target
• Trader Joe's

That's just a small list, but as you can see, I get really excited over the dumbest little every day stuff.  It may be silly, but it keeps me happy even where there isn't anything special going on to be excited about.

Happy Frappy

And for my third installment of the day, ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to corny Jessi!




I am so happy. Seriously. I often like to gripe about how my job is the worst ever, or how my car is a deathtrap, or whatever blah blah blah, but in reality, I am by far the happiest I have ever been. I have amazing, wonderful, fun, funny friends. My family (immediate and otherwise) is full of love, and, for the most part, healthy. I'm able to spend my days off however I want. I love where I live. There are exciting things on the horizon (travel, home-ownership, weddings, etc...).



All I'm saying is that I do get down, just like everyone else, but for the most part I go to bed every night and wake up every morning happy and fulfilled. And I am more thankful for that than I could ever say. I'm a lucky gal.

Groove is in my heart.

I love music, don't you?



Of course you do. Everyone loves music. If you DON'T love SOME kind of music, you're clearly a droid of some sort, and I'm afraid of you. 



I don't really work normal hours, so today was like my Sunday, and it was the kind of day that I was just in the mood to drive around aimlessly listening to music for several hours. I have days like those a lot. I'll head out of the house early to do some kind of errand, and then if the music's making me feel right I'll find some excuse to continue driving, usually to somewhere that's entirely out of my way. Or I'll just purposely drive past my turn and take the long way home. This also satisfies the explorer in me...I just moved to the area a few years ago and I'm still constantly finding new ways to get from here to there, or places that I never knew existed. I love it.



And don't even get me started on music social networking. I could (and do) spend hours and hours and HOURS on end on Spotify and Last.fm. I'll go to look one thing up on Spotify, and next thing I know the entire day is gone to going through friends' playlists and recommended music.




Here are some songs I've been digging on lately (most of which aren't necessarily new)



Heartbeats (Live) - The Knife
Place to Belong - Little Dragon
You Are the Ocean - Phantogram
Don't Move - Phantogram
Coronado - Deerhunter
Fall and Flee - The Dear Hunter (see what I did there?)
Valerie - The Zutons
Bang Bang Bang - Mark Ronson & The Business Intl
You Will Leave a Mark - A Silent Film
She's a Rainbow - The Rolling Stones
I Don't Want Love - The Antlers
No Windows - The Antlers
Reunion - M83
Wildfire - SBTRKT feat. Little Dragon
Dawn of the Dead - Does It Offend You, Yeah?
Disparate Youth - Santigold