2014 Wrap-Up

Happy 2015, everyone!

When I look back on my year, at first it seems like not much has changed from this time last year - which is fine, because the previous year was a huge transition and I started last year with plans on de-stressing and resetting. But then I read my "resolution" post from last year, and I realized that even though things are physically pretty similar to the way they were last January, mentally I'm in a totally different place.

I kind of forgot how weird I felt around this time last year. My life had gone through a major change, and I had done a lot of growing up in a very short period, so I felt uncomfortable in my skin and I had a lot of guilt issues about "abandoning" friends. I was also going through a major period of FOMO, but was in denial about it. I was really happy to be where I was, but I just felt weird about it. I felt displaced.

This year, I spent a lot of time reconnecting with myself, and reconnecting with Jeff. I didn't feel disconnected from him, per se, but this year we spent a lot more quality time together, and I feel closer to him than I ever have. Things have been a lot less stressful over the past year than they had been in the past, and it's been good to just be able to appreciate the good things in life without having to worry about a ton of other stuff. Not to say life was terrible before, or that we were going through anything particularly difficult, but things just feel very calm and stable right now, and it's nice.

Since the previous year had felt so chaotic, I had a pretty big list of goals for this past year, but they were pretty general. I'm not going to set specific goals for this year, because I don't feel like anything needs major change, and instead I'm going to just focus on appreciating the good things and taking advantage of my time doing things I enjoy and spending time with people I love. Pretty simple stuff.  Anyway, to address my goals from last year:

The first major "goal" I had was to get back on track with a healthy lifestyle. Results? We'll say, "Meh". I definitely didn't eat any healthier than I had been, but I wasn't a total train wreck about it, either (at least until the holidays hit). As far as working out every day before work...that was a joke. I didn't do that once. Not one time. It was too much work, having to bring my work clothes, keep them from getting wrinkled, lugging my makeup and hair stuff to the gym, attempting to shower in the locker room, etc. etc. It just wasn't happening. And that 12-9 schedule had me miserable. Remember that seasonal depression post? That was in the middle of that awful schedule. I do legitimately get seasonal depression, but that schedule was not helping by any means. It felt like my entire day was totally eaten up. Once I was on a more reasonable schedule, I did start going to the gym after work, and that went as it almost always does: I'd have a two or so month stretch where I'd go every day, I'd get busy and stop going for a month or two, and then I'd start going regularly again, and the cycle would repeat. My last cycle ended around November, and I officially decided to give up for the duration of the holiday season, but I'll go back in January and try to continue as frequently as possible throughout the year. It definitely does make a difference in the way I feel, and my schedule should be consistent this year so it should be a lot easier.

And then there was the social thing. I already mostly covered that, but I really am in a much better place mentally than I was last year. I spend a lot more time at home, but I feel totally fine with that now. When I do spend time with friends, I enjoy it a lot more because it feels more like an event than an every day occurrence. I finally feel like most of my friends are on the same page with me, so I don't feel guilty about leaving them behind and I don't feel left out of their lives. Not to mention I'm saving a ton of money by not going out three nights a week...though I have developed a bit of a shopping addiction. Maybe THAT should be a resolution.

The house thing...that's another "Meh." I got pretty much nothing on that list accomplished, but I don't really feel bad about it. When we first moved in, I was super hyper about making everything perfect right away and I was also reading a lot of DIY/home improvement blogs, which were making me feel like a total renovation loser. Our house the way it is right now is beautiful. It's not perfect, but it's home. I did decorate gradually over the year, and of course I'm always working on that. I still need to get our guest room done, because I hate making people crash on our third floor when they stay. The office is on pause, because we're not sure a dedicated office space is totally necessary. I still want to do the stuff I mentioned before like paint the staircase and semi re-do the kitchen, but I'm not really in a rush. We got our windows done, which was huge, and we got our heating situation resolved. I don't know if I mentioned this, but we're getting our roof re-done for free due to some hail damage from last spring, which is freaking amazing. That's going to happen next week. We do have official goals set for next spring/summer: our main goal is our exterior, which is a mess. Jeff's determined to make it functional and nicer looking, and of course I'm all for it as well. He's also determined to put a new, heated floor in our main bath because we get hardly any heat in there, so when we do that we're going to re-paint it as well. I'd also like to re-tile our shower and/or get a new sink/vanity, but we'll see. It's not a necessity. Smaller things we've done include putting a new faucet in the upstairs bathroom, putting a new rug in the living room, scoring my precious sideboard in the dining room, and mulching around our driveway (except we didn't maintain that, and now our work is pretty much ruined. And when I say "our work", I mean Jeff and our neighbor Liam's brother.) All in all, I think we did pretty well for our experience level and budget. We got a little lazy, but that's okay. Oh, and I still need to put stuff on the damn walls, but I have a pretty concrete plan worked out for that. More to come.

I guess that was it, other than "take more pictures". I guess I included that in my house goals. I'm still kind of bad at remembering to take pictures and I'm really weird about asking people to pose or asking strangers to take pictures of us, and I'm kind of (really) bad at taking candids that look like anything, but I'm trying to get better. I bought a "grown up" camera, and have been working on learning how to use it effectively, and I have photoshop now, so I'm thinking about taking an online photo-editing class. I'm happy that I've started blogging on a consistent schedule, and I'm going to try to improve on content.

All in all, it was a pretty great year, and I'm excited to see what 2015 has in store. Thanks for reading, and happy new year!

Yoga Breaths

As you may have noticed, I have a tiny, little bitty temper problem. I am naturally (I guess), for some reason, pretty short on patience, and it takes very little for me to fly off the handle. Unfortunately for my sanity, I am also pretty passive-aggressive, so instead of just blowing up, I internalize my lunatic urges. Recently, in some situations I've noticed that I can actually feel my blood pressure rising. I get light headed and tense, and I can actually feel my blood coursing through my veins. That ain't good, folks. So before I hulk out (or drop dead), I've decided it might be in my best interest to look into some stress-relievers.

I once mentioned to one of my work colleagues that if I'm speaking to someone particularly heinous that I have to "take yoga breaths". She found that hilarious, but that's a thing I actually do. I take long, deep breaths in through my nose and out through my mouth, and if I focus on my breathing, it tends to slow my heart rate and calm me down a bit.

Does anyone have any good tips on how to de-stress in an aggravating situation? Or, better yet, on how to prevent things from getting to you in the first place? I always thought of myself as a laid-back person when I was younger, but in the more recent years I've come to the conclusion that I was flat-out wrong and that I'm super high-strung. I'd love to be one of those people who just laughs when something goes wrong, but I just get tense so easily. Luckily, these feelings don't hang out for too long, so as quickly as I was triggered, I'll be happy as a clam again 20 minutes later. Is this sort of thing something that's just part of who you are, or can you tailor your personality to become more go-with-the-flow? It's definitely worth looking into.

Guest Room Mood Board

Our guest room progress (cough, cough) is slooooowly moving along. As I briefly mentioned a while back, we finally brought primer with intentions to jump in and get this party going. The room DID get primed - Jeff surprised me one day and had it done when I got home from work. But then we ran into a road block - I lifted up the big, gross area rug that's been in there since we moved in to peek at the condition of the floors. Do you remember how I whined at length about the floors being painted white for some inexplicable reason? Well, imagine my shock when I lifted up that rug to see that ONLY THE OUTSIDE of the floor is painted white. As in, there is a white BORDER painted around the floor, and the rest is the original hardwood color. So now I'm left with a slew of unappealing options:

1. I could carpet the room, which I don't really have the budget for and it seems like a big waste of money
2. I could totally re-do the floor of just this room, which means it won't match the rest of the floors upstairs, which I was planning on eventually re-doing anyway
3. I could re-do the floors of the entire upstairs. No, just kidding; that's DEFINITELY not in my budget.
4. I could buy a big-ass area rug for the room (like, REALLY big, because it will have to cover up the entire unpainted space, which is all but about a 2 inch border), which will probably end up costing me almost as much as carpeting the room would, or
5. I could just paint the rest of the floor white (or a different color), which might make me cry.

The only really realistic options at this point are 4 or 5 (or both...actually, if I do 5, definitely both), and I'm still undecided as to what I'm going to do. So I've just been pouting and putting off doing any further work, which means we now have a primed room with a big ugly puke green rug, no curtains, and a rainbow sherbet colored ceiling fan. Also, we finally put in our windows downstairs, so that project took precedence for the past several weeks. I'm going to eventually have to do SOMETHING, so I decided to make a mood board to give me a little inspiration.

I want our guest room to feel like a relaxing getaway, so I want to keep everything clean, simple, modern, and airy, while still being inviting and cozy to our guests.

1. We've decided to paint the room Moonshine, which is the color that we've used in the majority of our home. We love that it's neutral, but looks different colors depending on the room/time of day - sometimes it has greenish undertones, sometimes it looks more blue. And we like that sticking with the same color throughout most of the house gives our home a nice, calming flow.
2. I think that I'm going to ultimately go with a large jute rug in the room. It's a natural material and it goes with everything, so I could layer over it if I wanted, but it looks clean and modern by itself. It's also a relatively inexpensive material, which definitely helps since I need a pretty large rug.
3. This bed is similar to the one I've been eyeing up for the room, Ikea's TRYSIL. I originally was planning on purchasing the more feminine white iron-framed LEIRVIK, but now I'd rather go with a more gender-neutral Mid Century vibe. I plan to stick with white linens, which always feel extra relaxing and luxurious.
4. I'd love to add a deep indigo throw like this one to the end of the bed for a pop of color and extra warmth (and of course, a few throw pillows)
5. I love West Elm's Mid-Century Nightstand for this room, but I might try to save a few bucks and add some uniqueness by thrifting one instead.
6. I like the idea of a ceiling fan for a guest room so that whoever is staying in the room can have a little more control over the temperature of the room. This one is nice and modern, and is less hideous than a lot of other options.
7. I like this sharp little modern lamp, but might switch out the shade for a white one to go better with the rest of the room.
8. A couple of prints from Society 6 - I like the horse because he's kinda funny, but welcoming at the same time; and the other print is super chill and calming.
9. A storage bench is always great for a guest room so that there's somewhere to dump one's luggage when they arrive.
10. These curtains are gorgeous.
11. I love the idea of leaving a filled water carafe with a built-in cup for guests - who doesn't get thirsty at night, and no one wants to wander around someone else's house after dark searching for glasses.
12. I love the way this basket looks, and I think it's a great idea to have some towels/toiletries set right in the guest room so that they don't have to worry about asking for them. This is a great place to corral them.

I think I could probably use a couple of pops of color that aren't indigo so that the room doesn't look matchy, but this looks like a pretty good start to a killer room, if I do say so myself. Any suggestions for stuff I left out, or does anyone have anything in their guest room that they wouldn't be without?

What up, 2014?

Whew. I'm not normally huge on the whole "New year, new me" hoopla, and I don't usually set specific resolutions, but this new year really feels like a breath of fresh air. This past year spun a little out of control and I got a little off-base, so I'm looking forward to reset and refresh a bit. I feel like I'm in a really great place for 2014 to be the best year yet (I said before that every year gets better and better, and I stand by that), and so I've set some goals (RESOULTIONS, if you will) for myself to stay on track. I kinda started off with broad, general goals, and then set smaller, more specific plans on how to get there. Here's what I'm looking to do this year:

Get back on track with a healthy lifestyle.

I don't diet. I used to when I was younger, and then I got smarter and wiser and realized that diets are stupid and don't work for the long-term, and are also generally pretty unhealthy. So I usually just try to be generally healthy about the way I eat and stay as natural as possible, and if I want to eat something greasy and fatty and delicious REALLY BAD, then I eat it. In moderation, if possible (sometimes you just have to eat a whole pizza. It happens.) About halfway through the year, I got busy and stopped really paying attention to what I was eating and how I was eating, and I pretty much completely stopped working out. And now I feel like crap (physically). Time to get back to it. Here's what I'm gonna do:

1. Work out every day before work (at least four days a week). 

I now have a gym AT work, which gives me exactly ZERO excuses not to get there. And for at least the first few months of the year, I'll be working from 12 pm - 9 pm, so before work seems like the best plan. I've found over the past year that I'm actually kind of a morning person (believe me, I was just as shocked as you are at this realization). Getting my butt out of bed is difficult at times, but once I'm out, morning is my favorite time of the day. So I want to start an actual routine, so that it becomes like clockwork. This may have to be adjusted according to my schedule (I'm trying to get rid of the late shit as quickly as possible), and I'm giving myself one day a workweek wiggle room just to set myself up for success.

2. Eat (pretty much) only stuff that I feel good about eating.

I thought about this, and at first I was going to try to be a lot more specific, but if I pay attention to what I'm doing, I'm usually pretty good about this one without having to give myself actual rules (which makes it a lot easier to stick to). My only specific rule is no commercial soda (meaning I can still drink natural, carbonated beverages like club soda with a splash of fruit juice) and no fast food if AT ALL avoidable, both of which I've already basically eliminated from my diet (though I started slipping a bit with the soda rule over the holidays). So this means that I try to keep my diet about 80% natural, I try to stick to healthy fats (though I need to work on moderating my healthy fat intake, meaning not eating avocado on literally EVERYTHING and eggs by the pound), and I try to limit my red meat consumption to a few times a month and my meat consumption in general to a couple times a week. This should be a lot easier no longer working at a steakhouse, and no longer BAKING FOR A LIVING. I was seriously worried that I was going to give myself diabetes when I was having to constantly taste batters and doughs.

3. Try to be more active, in general.

I felt I had to add this one because I'm going from being on my feet 70% of the day every day to sitting at a desk staring at a computer all day, every day. When I was serving, I felt justified to spend all of my leisure time vegging on the couch watching tv or sitting in a bar. Now that I'm a lot less active in general, I'm going to try doing more active stuff just for fun (and I'm going to try to convince Jeff to join me, which will be a feat in and of itself). I want to start trying new stuff, exploring more, and being outside more. I'm not going to bother pushing myself to get outside more when it's cold because I just don't have the capacity for it and it's not gonna happen, but at least when it starts warming up I'd like to get out more. I'd really like to buy a couple bikes and start riding around.

Figure out what my idea of "fun" actually means.

Okay, this one's pretty vague. I say this because my life has changed so drastically in the past year, that I still think that I need to be doing the same things I used to do to have fun, and I don't even realize it when I'm enjoying myself a lot of the time. I don't have the time, energy, or honestly the money to "go out" the way I used to, and if I really think about it, I don't WANT to. I was actually really bored with it, and was probably well on my way to getting into some kind of trouble (or at least people thinking I was a fool). That certainly doesn't mean that I'm going to stop drinking altogether, or that I'm never going to go to a bar again, but I need to stop thinking that I'm missing out when nothing that exciting is really happening.

1. Spend more time with people I really and truly enjoy, and stop trying so hard to make friends with everyone I meet.

I don't want this to sound like people that I'm acquaintances with suck, or that I don't appreciate them. All I mean by this is that I've met so many people over the past 10 years that it's dizzying. Between all of the moving I've done and all of the various jobs I've had, I've come across way more "new" people than probably most people my age have, so I've gotten into this mode where I'm just constantly trying to make new friends with EVERYONE, because I'm used to it being necessary. I'm not AGAINST making new friends if I click with someone or if I have a lot in common with them, but I seem to collect groups of people that I have literally nothing in common with and have nothing to really talk about, and then I feel bad about neglecting them when I don't have time to hang out with everyone I know. I have a solid number of people that I truly enjoy spending time with, and I want to dedicate more time to them and developing (or re-developing) solid friendships and less to hanging out with people I don't really even know, or that are half my age and make me feel old and lame. Which leads to...

2. Stop feeling so guilty.

Going from young-adulthood, where your friends are EVERYTHING in life, to full-blown adulthood, where your family becomes your main focus, is hard, and I'm having growing pains. It's hard to get over the idea of your group of friends being your entire support network and knowing where you are and what you're doing and what you're thinking every minute. In fact, just writing that with the assumption that it's no longer true is making me feel guilty. I have that thing that a lot of women have where I feel like I have to be everything to everyone in my life, and I get spread so thin that I'm never really there with anyone. I need to get used to the fact that I'm just going to spend less time with friends, and start really taking advantage of the time that I DO get to spend with them. And when I'm not with them, I need to stop feeling like I'm abandoning them and feeling guilty for not being there for everything that happens. If something big happens, good or bad, I'll be there. That's what matters. And on the same note, I need to get used to my FRIENDS having families that are now THEIR main focus, and to not feel abandoned by them, or left out. I have to find a balance, and feel okay with it.

3. Create more.

Now that I'm pretty much set on the career front and don't have to constantly rack my brain trying to figure out what I want to DO with my life, I have a lot more time and energy to actually be creative. I've gotten really into design over the past year, and I want to make my home beautiful and personal. This could mean painting, or DIY projects, or home improvement projects. I also (as I mentioned) want to get back into blogging consistently, so I'm going to try for at least 3 times a week. And of course, I'm excited to get back into baking for fun.

Get back to making our house our home.

This one is the most self-explanatory, and was the most easy to set specific goals for. We got busy and complacent and completely stopped working on our house, and it still needs a LOT of work. Honestly, this place already feels like home to me (and I think to Jeff and Grooby as well), but I want to get the ideas I have to make this place my dream house into action. Here's what I want to have done by the end of the year (while trying to be realistic in a skills and budgetary sense):

1. Put stuff on the damn walls.

I have developed a phobia of hanging pictures. This is ridiculous. I think it dates back to technology class (what my middle school called "shop class") with Mr. Chitester (sp?). That guy terrified me, and the first thing he taught us was to properly measure. Somehow the terror that he instilled in me made me permanently afraid of measuring ANYTHING, and now that has projected onto being afraid of hanging pictures in the wrong place, and them not being straight, or evenly measured, and it looking like an unprofessional mess. This has lead to my walls being literally BARE. There is no art, or family pictures, or mirrors, or ANYTHING hung ANYWHERE. Anything that's on the walls was either already here, or hastily thrown up by Jeff when we moved in just to put it somewhere. I really noticed how detrimental this was to our home's overall feel during the holidays, when we were actually using our dining room. It's pretty much just a bare room with a table in the middle of it, and in pictures it looks TERRIBLE. It looks like we just moved in. We've been here for six months. I need to get over it, because mama loves her a gallery wall.

2. Get going on the office and guest room.

Other than taking that pile of junk out of the guest room (the pink room) and a mess and Jeff's clothes in the office (the blue room), those two rooms pretty much still look exactly like these pictures I took back in July. It's getting really old not having a functioning guest room (we've actually entertained way more than I thought we would), and Jeff really wants to have his own space in the form of the office, so I'm itching to whip these rooms into shape. I have specific goals for each room for this year, because both rooms need a bit more work than we can probably get done or budget for this year alone. As for the office, that carpet is probably going to stay for another year, because I think we're just going to re-do the whole upstairs floor all at once. So I want to get the carpet in the deep-cleaned, and then I want to get the room painted and at least get a desk in there. And obviously the window treatments (and closet "doors") need switched out. And as for the guest room, I'd like to get a large area rug in there to cover up the white painted floor, and get a bed and nightstands in there with fresh linens. I'm really excited to decorate in there, but I'm not really sure what I'm going to do yet. I'd like to have it painted and get those awful curtains out of there by spring. I think from there on out it will be pretty much smooth sailing.

3. The kitchen.

Oh, man. It makes me nervous writing this one down, but I feel like it gives me a little more of a push to actually get it done. I'm apprehensive about the kitchen. It'll be our first big undertaking as far as home improvement goes. But, I'm gonna say it. By the end of the year, I want to change the backsplash, which means I also want to have all of the walls painted. I'm not going to commit to ripping out the plaster by the end of the year just yet, but we'll see. And while we're doing the backsplash and the walls, I also want to take out the cabinet over the island and install open shelves. Being sandwiched next to the fridge and set directly over our island makes this cabinet almost impossible to access, and I love the look of open shelves to display dishes. I recently bought a set of simple white dishes, so I feel like I can actually display them out in the open now, which would really help my "my dishes are currently stored right in the middle of where all my food is, which doesn't make any sense" dilemma. And I'd really like to have my ever growing mug collection out in the open. I have no idea how any of this is going to go, but I'm jazzed about it, at least in theory.

4. Lighting.

There is exactly one lighting fixture in this house that I don't hate, and it's in our upstairs bathroom. All of the other ones got to GO. And the foyer and living room are both SCREAMING for lighting fixtures, because neither of them have one at all, in general. At the moment, my goal is to get a new pendant in the dining room by the holidays next year (probably sooner, because the one that's there now drives me bonkers), install a pendant in the foyer (however the hell you do that), get rid of the pastel ceiling fan in the guest room, and put in new lanterns outside. There's something wrong with the electrical outlets out there, so we'll have to figure that out, too. I want that figured out before summer (and certainly before next Christmas, because our neighbors put up Christmas lights this year and we couldn't, and our side of the house looked sad and forlorn).

There is a LOT of other stuff I want to get done to this place, but a lot of it is little stuff, and I want to try to be realistic about the big stuff. So I'm gonna stick with this, and consider anything else that gets done a bonus.

Take more pictures.

I don't really know if this fit in somewhere else, but I just remembered it and I feel very strongly about it. I LOVE having pictures, and I usually don't remember to take any until the last minute (or the last hour of a party, when all of the pictures that get taken are blurry and off-center and taken with my iPhone). I keep forgetting to ask for a good camera for Christmas, so it looks like I'm going to have to bite the bullet and buy one for myself. I want a grownup camera, not just a point-and-shoot digital crap camera, that takes beautiful pictures and actually captures moments. And I want to learn to use it. And then I want to ACTUALLY use it. And then I need to remember to actually have pictures printed. Now that we have a house to display pictures in, it'd be nice to actually have pictures to display.



So, those are my goals, both broad and specific, for the next year. I'm really excited to be able to gather myself and take a breath this year. It's nice to have a lot of my more major goals covered so that I can work on the little stuff and not have to stress out about huge milestones. I hope you guys enjoyed your holidays, and are as pumped for 2014 as I am. Cheers.

How to make your boyfriend hate you.

I'm going to give you some fashion tips. Why? Did anyone ask me for fashion tips? Am I particularly fashionable? Can I even pull half of the styles that I enjoy off? Perhaps the answer to all of these questions is a resounding "NO."...but this is MY BLOG, god damnit, and I will do as I please.



 As you may recall, a couple of posts ago I did a list of weight loss tips. The whole post was clearly a (ridiculous) joke. I assure you, nothing I'm about to say is a joke, though I'm sure some of it will most certainly sound ridiculous.



DISCLAIMER: I've reached a point in my life in which I no longer dress/style myself to catch the attention of men/sexual conquests. At this point in my life, my fashion goal is to make other bitches want to be me. Am I successful most of the time? Hell no. But that's the goal that I have in mind while dressing myself. I understand that this is not the MO of everyone, and that's fine. If you're looking to pick up a fly honey, probably do the exact OPPOSITE of everything I suggest. What dudes like to see on girls is NOT the same thing as what girls will envy/want to emulate. I'll go more into this later. Here we go.

Jessi's Style Tips!!!!

1. Want to look skinny? Squash those titties down, girl! Lots of women like to put emphasis on their breasts. They push them up, they squoosh them together, they pad them, they wear low-cut things to show them off.  Not this girl. My chest is not particularly large to begin with, but I like to go a step further and flatten it as much a humanly possible, so as to look like an 11 year old boy. Most of the clothes I buy look better on a boobless woman (in my opinion, anyway). My favorite way to achieve this look is with an bandeau bra. They come in endless cute colors/patterns, and they work as an accessory as WELL as a way to contain your ladies. You can wear them under sheer tops, and if you're wearing something low-cut and your bandeau shows a little bit, it just looks like a cami.
2. Keep your boyfriend in mind, and then pick the exact opposite of whatever he would like. When shopping, I ask myself, "Would Jeffrey think that this is hideous?" If the answer is yes, I buy it. I recently bought a chambray shirt, and the first time I wore it he told me I looked like a barrel racer (or something to that effect). One time I told him that he should tell me I'm hot more often, and he replied with "You should stop dressing like a homeless person." (this was all in fun; we were laughing.) I don't mind that Jeff hates the way I dress. I know that he loves me regardless, and he still thinks I look smokin' hot no matter what I wear. Now, that's not to say that I think that there's anything wrong with dressing to impress your fella every once in a while. I use this as a general rule, but every now and then I'll pick an outfit because I know Jeff will love it (he loves outfits that make me "look like an elf". The fuck. That's my guy.) Also, Jeff is not a PARTICULARLY fashionable, or certainly not trendy, guy. If your guy has a great fashion sense that meshes well with yours, by all means take his advice.
3. Embrace messy hair. I know that this quote is getting thrown all over the place these days, but it's true. I get WAY more complements on my hair when it's unwashed and gross and I've literally just thrown it up to get it out of my face then when I actually "do" it. Messy, free-spirited hair is very "in" right now, but it also requires no effort or concern. You don't have to worry about re-doing it halfway through the day or going outside and having it blown out of place, because it's already messy and it'll just get better throughout the day. Awesome, right?
4. Pair classic and simple with trendy. You don't want to walk around looking like an Urban Outfitters threw up on you. Take one trendy, patterned piece and pair it with something simple and boring. Or, if you're the type of person that can pull it off, layer a bunch of crazy patterns together, but I'm certainly not such a person (and most people aren't). Just whatever you do, don't get matchy. 
5. Accessorize your shit. I've learned that this is important, because I DON'T accessorize properly. I tend to wear a lot of boring, slouchy neutrals, and without proper accessories, I really DO just look like a homeless person. I've been getting more into layering costume-y type jewelry, and I recently got a great gold boyfriend watch as a birthday gift from Jeff. I've always been big into scarves. I think I'm going to try to get into hats a little bit more. It really makes a huge difference.
6. Follow your own style. For example, I don't care HOW fashionable it might be; I will NEVER wear leopard/cheetah print ANYTHING. I don't like peplum. Don't follow trends just because other people are. If you're wearing something that clearly doesn't suit your personal style/personality, you'll look uncomfortable and dumb. Also, if you start following every trend possible you'll risk looking like a high school student instead of a put-together adult. Wear what you like and pass on the rest.
7. Don't be a dumb skank. Or, in other words, dress for your occasion. Nothing annoys me more than when girls show up to dive bars in sequined, crotch grazing, sausage tight dresses and stilettos. Or when housewives show up to a casual restaurant bar in attire meant for the club (which they probably shouldn't be going to anyway). Or HEELS in the GYM!? Bitch, please. Seriously. I know that I said that I'm not trying to impress guys, but even if you are, when you dress COMPLETELY inappropriately for your age/venue, you just look desperate and comical. You are NEVER going to come out looking sexy or on your game by dressing like a whore in church. I'm just saying. Though not as offensive (in my opinion), this also applies to wearing workout gear to a relatively nice dinner or pajamas to the mall. Just dress like a functioning  member of society. It's not difficult.
8. Tell me to shut up, because I probably have no idea what I'm talking about, and have no right to be advising anyone on what to wear.

So, there you have it. If all else fails, just buy a forever lazy and wear that bitch everywhere. You'll look like an insane person, but dammit if you're not the comfiest person in the room.

Weight loss tips for the new year!

Happy new year everyone!



I know that A LOT of you probably have made the resolution to lose weight in the next year. Or "eat better" or "tighten that ass up" or "be healthy" or what the eff ever. So, being as wonderful and helpful as I am, I have decided to give you some of MY personal weight loss tips. So, without further ado:

Jessi's Weight Loss and Diet Tips!!!!!!!

1. If you don't like it, it doesn't count.  Sometimes I'll start eating something, and even though I don't HATE it, it's just not really my cup of tea. If this happens to you, just go ahead and continue eating it. In fact, you might as well just finish it. Calories from food that you're not enjoying don't count, and therefore will not cause you to gain weight.
2. Homemade food is ALWAYS healthy, and therefore practically calorie free. So, you've decided that instead of going out and eating a decadent, calorie-dense meal, you're going to cook a healthy meal at home.  However, somehow along the way you purchased all of the ingredients for gigantic steak burritos with a shitload of guacamole, sour cream, and refried beans, and have decided to make humongous homemade margaritas and fried ice cream. Not to worry! When you cook something yourself, it ALWAYS has less calories than whatever you would have ordered at any restaurant, and you may therefore eat, like, FOUR burritos and drink an entire pitcher of those margaritas! You probably burned off more calories cooking than you ate, anyway. You go, girl!
3. When you're drunk, the calories that you consume don't really exist. If you can't remember eating it, you didn't!
4. Also, calories from alcohol aren't real calories. Really, what harm could a bottle or two of wine cause? It's just grapes! Don't kid yourself, though: don't order frozen, blended drinks. I mean, c'mon. Fattie.
5. Calories from small pieces of things don't count. Say you're eating some cookies. Bad, right? WRONG! Just break those babies apart, and graze on them throughout the day! Broken cookies are practically diet food! Because they contain NO CALORIES! You can eat about eight cookies in total, but as long as they were broken you have NO IDEA how many cookies you've consumed, and therefore will see NO ill effects! This also works with eating a few chips at a time, or pretzels, or bites of ice cream...just don't even THINK about sitting down with a WHOLE BOWL. Don't be disgusting.
6. If you go to the gym and then immediately leave, it counts. Forgot your earbuds? Gym's too busy? You think that guy lifting weights looks suspicious and will probably murder you? No problem! Girl, you made it to the gym, and that's what counts. Go take a nap, you deserve it!
7. Coffee creamer doesn't add up throughout the day. Uh, the caffeine cancels it out. Duh.
8. Running one mile a day, twice a week makes you A RUNNER. Even if you walk 3/4 of the mile. And runners are hot! Congratulations, hottie!

There you go! I hope my tips were helpful and inspiring. Don't give up, 2013 is your year to shine! 

Oh god, what is this blog turning into?

I always tell myself that I don't do new year's resolutions, but I guess I kind of do.



The thing is, I think that by calling it a "resolution", it makes it easier to give up. Say you want to lose 10 pounds, and make it your resolution to do so. You start going to the gym January 2nd, and you start some stupid fad diet, and by January 28th you're over it. So you just say, "meh, it was just a resolution, who ever succeeds with those anyway?" and go on with your life. You're setting yourself up for failure.



Instead, I just try to continually improve my life, regardless of what exact plan I use. But I do kind of use January as a reset to gather my thoughts and get back on whatever path I may have been on before the holidays.



Some goals I have for the next year or so are as follows:

• First, the goal that EVERYONE makes: start going to the gym again, regularly. I'm not the HUGEST distance runner in the world, but I'd like to do maybe at least a couple 5ks this year. I'm also considering changing my gym to a little bit of a nicer one, which would make me want to go more. 
• My second goal kind of goes with my first goal: I want to start waking up a lot earlier, on a regular basis. I've noticed over the past year that the time I'm happiest is the time directly after I get up. I love to sit and drink a cup of coffee and maybe watch some food network. I'd like to start getting up early enough to go to the gym or for a run and then come home and decompress before starting my day. This will be an ongoing process, but I think it'll be worth it.
• Move my career forward. I've already started on this one, and am excited for what's to come. I'd like to get to a point some time in the near future (maybe not quite by the end of 2013, but soon) to where I don't have to wait tables at all anymore. 
• Buy a house. Or at least make some major progress in the direction of buying a house. Jeff and I started the process last spring, and then got busy and just kind of stopped. I want OUT of this apartment, and I refuse to move until we buy a house. I'm really excited to move into a place and really make it our home.
• Start doing some DIY projects. This is a LITTLE difficult, as I don't really have an outdoor area to spray paint/stain/etc, but I'll make do. I really want to do some DIY wall art, and maybe start hitting up some thrift stores for furniture projects. I'm hesitant to do this, as I have no interest in decorating our apartment anymore and nowhere to store anything, but I think having things to decorate/furnish our house with BEFORE we buy will help a lot.
• Continue to better my diet. Over the past two years, I've been eating a LOT healthier, and trying to cut way back on certain types of foods/drinks. Currently I've been following a pescatarian (vegetarian, but with seafood) diet about 4 out of 7 days a week. I don't know if I'll ever go totally vegetarian, but I've considered it (and actually did it when I was a teenager). I also completely stopped drinking soda (except for club soda) this past year, and have practically cut out deep-fried food (though if I'm really craving it, I'll eat a little every once in a while. Everything in moderation, yo!). I feel a LOT better since I've done this, and my skin looks about a million percent better. I just look at it as an on-going process, and try not to deprive myself of anything I'm REALLY craving, which makes it a lot easier to keep it up.
• Maintain my damn hair. I kid you not when I tell you that I literally did not cut my hair ONE TIME in 2012. Not even a trim. Nor did I do anything to the color, which would be fine except for the fact that it WAS colored to start with. Luckily, my...highlights? (I don't even remember what I did with the color the last time) weren't THAT different from my natural color, so I just jokingly tell everyone my hair is ombre...and I think sometimes people actually believe me. Anyway, I love my long hair and don't want to cut it, but I need a little shape or SOMETHING, and I need to at least get a single process done and stick with it. And get regular trims, so I don't look like a homeless person.
• Try to visit home more often (both my ACTUAL home - Jamestown, NY - and my mom, in Dubois, PA). I've only been to Jamestown once the ENTIRE time I've lived in Delaware, which has been four years this week. I go to Dubois more often, but I've really been missing my family lately. It only takes 4.5 hours to get to Dubois and about 6 hours get to Jamestown, and now that I have a relatively consistent work schedule I have no excuse not to drive up more frequently. My 10 year high school reunion is in June, so I'm already on my way.
• Last, and definitely least...get adult braces. Ugh. I've always wanted/needed to get braces, but put it off because I didn't have dental insurance and couldn't afford them...or at least that's what I told myself. Really, I just don't want to deal with it. But now I DO have dental, which will cover possibly the ENTIRE COST, plus my mom has offered to pay for it, even if I want to do invisalign (which I certainly DO, if it's possible). Just the thought of having braces for who knows how long makes me shudder, but it'll be WELL worth it in the long run. I really want to have a perfect smile in my wedding pictures, so I feel as though time is probably of the essence. 

So, there you have it. I'm sure I'll come up with some more stuff as the year goes on, but those are my most important goals for the time being. What do you hope to accomplish in 2013?